Throughout my life, I’ve been lucky enough to hang around
million-dollar athletes, history-making attorneys, world-famous
musicians, and friends that you never heard of who change people’s lives
for the better every day. The common bond between all of these people
is the ability to live life to its fullest on their own terms.
While there is no secret to success, I’ve tried to learn from other
successful people who have entered my life, even if only for a minute or
two. Today, I’m sharing a few of those lessons. The universe offers
boundless rewards and only your own thinking and behaviors can determine
how much of it you reap. I’m not saying that I’ve perfected all of
these, but I have witnessed the result of both positive and negative
influences.
As individuals, each of us has a different definition of success. It
isn’t necessarily monetary or fame—the process itself may define
success. Whatever your goals, here are a few things to avoid that
less-successful individuals typically let guide their life. Once we
recognize them, we can make changes that will propel our lives to a
different place.
Not Working on Yourself
The number one thing that I’ve discovered through the years is that
successful people are continually working on themselves. They are
constantly learning, developing skills, and growing within. You must
spend time, effort, and money on yourself and your passion. How many
seminars or classes have you looked into but decided that you couldn’t
attend because of the money? Do you feel guilty when you take some time
for yourself? In order to be successful, these patterns must change.
Your investment in yourself will pay off exponentially over time.
Wild Goals Without Action
I always talk about dreaming big. There’s nothing wrong with that.
However, if you dream big without taking action, then it’s just wishful
thinking. Break down your big dream into bite-sized chunks so that you
can actually work toward them.
“I have no control” Thinking
The way you perceive the world will determine your ability to
succeed. If you believe you have no control over your life, then you
won’t. The economy, your job—it’s everyone else’s fault. If you believe that, then you don’t
have much chance at success. Successful people take accountability and
work through the obstacles to achieve success. Believe that you have
what it takes to work through anything.
Perceiving Others’ Worth Over Your Own
When you work on yourself, you develop your goals, values,
priorities, and purpose in life. Without that, you perceive others’
worth as greater than your own. How can you move forward and achieve
success if you don’t know your own goals and priorities? If you don’t
know what your driving force is, you will unlikely put in the effort
necessary to achieve success. Ninety-nine percent of the time … it’s not
money. It’s something deeper and more rewarding than money.
Lack of Faith in Themselves
We all make mistakes throughout life. Making mistakes is not a sign
of weakness. We learn and grow from mistakes. I’ve made plenty in my
life. It’s how I react to those mistakes that determine how successful
I’ll be. I know where my weaknesses are, but that does not mean that I
don’t believe in myself.
Looking for the Easy Way
We see this a lot in the social media world. Everyone is looking for
the secret or asking for something without providing something in
return. Don't fall into this trap. If you are going to post something, don't sell me. Give me something to think about, laugh about or learn from. Successful people are respectful of
others’ time and efforts. This doesn't mean you shouldn't reach out and ask for
help; just don’t expect something for nothing. Show your appreciation. How many times have you clicked the "donate here" button on a website that you get great info from? No matter how
small the token, you will be the one they remember in the future.
A common thread connects most of the items above—continually working
on yourself. Look for your areas of weakness and find one or two things
that you can change. Little by little, you’ll discover that you are
getting one step closer to your definition of success.
Jim Devitt is the author of the #1 Kindle Bestselling
Young Adult novel, The Card and So This is Christmas.
He's also a healthcare consultant specializing in helping healthcare companies
and practices develop a social media marketing platform, and maximize cash
flow. You can find him posting weekly to Indies Unlimited
and occasionally as a contributor on Yahoo!
A version of this post was originally published by Jim Devitt on Indies Unlimited.
Yep, but those can be tall orders. :)
ReplyDeleteThanks, Yvonne, I really appreciate you stopping by. You're the best.
DeleteGreat post, Jim. Along with the 'I have no control' thinking, there's the "I don't have the time' excuse, but if you really want to do something, you can almost always find the time.
ReplyDeleteMel, you are so right. get up a little earlier, stay up a little later, just make it work. If something is worth it, you'll find a way.
DeleteThanks so much for popping in to comment!
Good stuff, Jim. A lot of what you're talking about here can be boiled down to magical thinking -- which unfortunately doesn't work.
ReplyDeleteThanks Lynne. You're right, and unfortunately I see way too many Indie Authors trying to work with magical thinking. And thanks, it's really nice of you to stop in and comment.
DeletePerceiving others' worth over my own... guilty as charged ;) It's been a tough shift going from being in the classroom all day to freelancing from home. Once I realized how much I am externally motivated, it has helped me get a handle on how to deal with that tendency. Well that, and a great career coach too.
ReplyDeleteWhat great insight, Jeri. It's so important to know yourself and how you deal with things. A great career coach doesn't hurt either!
Delete